Behavior change is a continuous process. It should be temporary, not permanent, to maintain the necessary balance. To make it permanent, one must work on their strengths. I start working on the behavior I want to change, maintaining a balance by achieving small wins without over-expecting. This is the paradox of behavior change, and my personal journey is a testament to this paradox.

Understanding the Paradox

It is important to understand the paradox. I wanted to improve my physical and mental health, break old bad habits, develop new habits, and nurture my creativity. Essentially, I wanted to change my behavior, but I often saw my efforts neglected. These issues can be understood through physiological and psychological lenses.

The Role of Identity

My behavior is intertwined with my identity. Thus, behavior change is essentially a change in my identity. For example, I am known as a “night owl” because I like to stay up late to perform my tasks. However, I felt this was harming my health, so I made a routine to do these tasks during the day instead of at night. I wanted this behavior change to become part of my identity, but it was relatively painful to change.

The Habit Loop

There are three main steps in habit formation: the cue, routine, and reward, which form a loop. I used this loop to change my habit. I observed that if one of these three elements is omitted, my habit change is disrupted, and I am likely to revert to my old habits. Changing habits requires configuring the entire loop, which was a challenge for me.

The Comfort Zone

My bad habits were comfortable because they were part of my comfort zone. The new behavior seemed uncomfortable, requiring mental effort and pressure to get out of this bad comfort zone. I realized that the new behavior was beneficial for me, so I stretched my powers beyond the comfort zone. In transition, the new behavior became comfortable.

Strategies for Overcoming the Paradox

1. Small Steps:

As the first step in behavior change, I broke it down into smaller steps. Realizing that big changes would not bring success, I prioritized small successes. This reduced the additional pressure to change behavior and helped me maintain the right balance.

2. Environmental Modifications:

The formation of new behavior requires changing the environment of the old behavior. For example, I decided to have fresh fruit every morning instead of tea or coffee. To support this change, I put fresh fruits on my dining table in the morning and kept tea or coffee-making facilities out of reach. Changing the environment is essential to creating new behavior.

3. Self-Compassion:

Changing behavior is one of the hardest things to do. Even though it is difficult, I have been very patient and compassionate with myself. I practiced self-compassion throughout the process.

Finally, the behavior change paradox is complex in practice. In case of change, a quick change can take you back to where you were before. So you need to aim for gradual change without rushing. I patiently made to changes in my normal days. In the end it took a revolutionary turn in my life. So you should always be mindful and aware of changing your behavior. Make yourself happy by forming a nice new behavior.